[A guest post by Rachel Guillot]
“You are settling”, she says,
but she doesn’t know how far I’ve come,
how far we’ve come
how worn out we are from the fight
to be seen and heard
How hard the ground was that we dug,
have been digging,
are still digging
With implements and wills of iron
Sometimes barely scratching
the unyielding surface of hardened clay-like dirt
But inspired to keep going
by just the occasional glimpse of the dark, rich, fertile soil underneath that hints of
equality
She doesn’t know a world
where girls are taught to be “sugar and spice and everything nice”
She doesn’t know a world
where most churches misuse scripture to keep a woman muted and in her place
She doesn’t know a world
where girls are encouraged to develop secretarial and housekeeping skills
you know, so they can be useful
She doesn’t know a world
where a woman’s greatest chance for success lies in her ability to marry well
She doesn’t know a world
where only boys are athletic enough to be worth watching
on the field or in the gymnasium
She doesn’t know that we have spent decades trying to silence
The voices in our head
that told us we must be physically attractive to the opposite sex
And yet not get pregnant or raped, God forbid
Boys will be boys, after all
And it is a woman’s lot to bear the brunt of toxic male behavior
The voices in our head
that told us that it is the primary responsibility of the woman to ensure that her
husband’s every need is met so he is not prone to wander.
Apparently character only matters in females
And the voices in our head
that told us that we were too prone to emotional decision-making
to work in corporations or pastor churches or even, gasp, lead a country
That we didn’t have what it takes to make the big, logical decision consistently
After all, everyone knows how irrational women are during their “period”
That even women don’t like working for women, because they are so catty, right?
Thank God she doesn’t know what she doesn’t know.
She doesn’t know she is standing on our shoulders
When she anticipates a marriage and workspace without gender roles
When she decides what to study in college based on her strengths,
not her limited options
When she takes out a mortgage or credit card in her own name, without a co-signer
When she can boldly assert that rape is never justified, under any circumstances
When she believes that her opinions matter
To everyone
Thank God she doesn’t even know.
Copyright 2019 Rachel Guillot (submitted to Listen Softer on July 2, 2019)